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Monday 17 January 2011

Chatty Chatty Ex…

Dear Killa,

Six months ago my baby father left me for another woman in the same housing scheme. I get to understand that he and her have been walking the street and talking how I look like an old cow and how nobody wants me. Killa, I desperately want to get back on the man market (plus mi want fi spite di b&*%h dem). I know my face is still pretty but I need your fatherly advice.

Dear Pretty Cow,

Yuh a lead and a set di trend (Gal). Cause yuh and dem could nevah be friends, and dem a nuff up di place like oxygen. Mek di walk and di pose fi dem (Gal), cause yuh nah wear nuh clothes fi dem (Gal). Nah fi borrow, have nuttin fi lend and yuh nuh care a who dem wyaah send.

Well! Dem look warm but yuh ultra hot. All heads roll when yuh touch pon di spot. Dem a drop off a farm, yuh deh pon di top. Standing ovation every man a clap. Flawless God bless, a yuh dem caan stop. Slap a gal in har face if a bright she chat. Man a dead ova di face and di shape yuh got. Model and mek a gal ketch heart attack!!

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